the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
