Moan for me like Helen Keller
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
