we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
