I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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