...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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