That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
