i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
