Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i wish my penis had a tongue
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
