I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
