sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
