between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
