My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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