I wish I only lived at night.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Boobs speak an international language.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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