Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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