erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
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