Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
