Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
