SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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