Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
