He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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