I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Randomize
