uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
