i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
