That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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