I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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