Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
