We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
