shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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