Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I have fence marks all over my body
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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