Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
