I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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