That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
