So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
i think im in europe. pls send help
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
