ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
