no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize