Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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