Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
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