just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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