this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
