i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
