OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
