Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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