no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Two words: nipple clamps
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