just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
She needs sedatives and a leash
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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