Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
