hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
