So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
my being single is dangerous.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
