Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
