My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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