Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
