Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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